The warm glow of the holidays
may only seem only to accentuate grief if you are suffering. You may feel like the Little Match Girl or Boy looking in from the outside, shivering alone in the cold and locked out from the all the warmth and joy.
I remember a time when Christmas bells rang empty in my grieving heart. I only saw what wasn’t there. A silent voice, an empty chair, a missing face. No matter how bad my heart was broken, the world didn’t stop for me. Christmas still came. I closed the door and tried to lock it out, but it did no good. It was somewhere inside of me.
My dog looked at me in her usual earnest way, but on that day it seemed to mean that I should take her for a walk in the sparkling snow, build a fire to keep her warm, and then roast a chicken. I did all of that, when I hadn’t even planned to get out of bed.
When I look back on that day now, I see there was something about Christmas that re-ignited the light of my spirit. It was just a small light at that time, but it was a light. Slowly but surely, it grew brighter.
Even if the holidays are a sad time for you this year, I hope you will find a small light that burns within you and illuminates hope, peace, serenity, and self-compassion. May that light ~ and all it shines upon ~ grow bigger and brighter with each day of the New Year.
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