The two traits all abusive people have in common: They lack empathy and they are manipulative.
Emotional reciprocity, love and belonging are essential human needs, and if these needs are not being met, then mental and physical health will suffer.
Intimacy has to do with trust, understanding, and feeling understood. Intensity, on the other hand, is all about drama, anxiety, uncertainty, and fear.
Invalidation is considered one of the most damaging forms of emotional abuse. Abusers use invalidation as a tool of manipulation and a weapon. Others may be short on empathy. Some may feel uncomfortable with your pain. Some are simply jealous.
When you’re backed into an emotional corner, acting out does not mean you’re crazy, and it does not make you the abuser. It means you’re a normal person pushed to your limits by a manipulator.
When targeted by a psychopath,
we unwittingly become an opponent in a game we don’t even know we’re playing. The stakes are high and the odds are stacked in their favor. They make the rules, and play to win.
After our experience in a psychopathic bond, we are shaken to our core. The firm foundation we believed we stood on crumbled beneath us. We find ourselves in a liminal place — a place of ‘in-between.’
Emotional manipulation can be so subtle and undercover that it can control you for quite a while before you figure out what’s happening, if you ever do. Learn how.