A MUST-READ If You Ask Yourself “WHY DID I STAY?” or “WHY CAN’T I LEAVE?”
Why did you stay? Why did I, and why did the rest of us? If you’re still involved, why can’t you leave? Find out below. In the process, free yourself from needless self-blame and shame. It is tremendously powerful to understand the facts of your...
In the Aftermath: GRIEF
The person you loved—maybe more than you ever loved anyone before—and who loved you just as much, is gone from your life, never to return. Of course you’re grieving. But wait a minute, you tell yourself. You shouldn’t be grieving because you...
The Peace and Healing of Acceptance
“It is so. It cannot be otherwise.” ~ Inscription on the Ruins of a 15th Century Cathedral in Amsterdam What is acceptance? And how can it help you heal from the trauma of psychopathic victimization? Acceptance is, put simply, the acknowledgement of reality....
The Self-Compassion Effect
Step outside yourself for a moment, if you will, and turn and look at yourself. There you are, the ‘you’ who was mistreated and who is now treating yourself so harshly, who is feeling shame, despair, doubt, outrage, confusion, self-doubt, deep sadness,...
The Known, the Unknown and the Unknowable
“There are things known and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors of perception.” ~ Aldous Huxley The unknown is encountered in the midst of the known. It manifests within what is usual and familiar, and hides there. The unknown is the...
The Unique and Powerful Harm of Betrayal
“There’s coming out of relationships, there’s getting your heart broken, and then there’s that rare and special time you crawl out of a relationship bleeding at your knees, heart shattered, brain smashed, gut splattered and wondering what the point of reality...
Your Own Personal Apocalypse
“I can’t go on. I’ll go on.” (Samuel Beckett) Most of us have said those words in the aftermath of a psychopath. At first, we think “I can’t go on.” Those days are the darkest. At some point, we dare to think “I’ll go...
Are You Contemplating Ending Your Life?
This morning I received a note from a reader named Michael who said, “I am so emotionally devastated that I have been struggling to keep myself safe from suicide.” ♥ To Michael and other readers who may be contemplating suicide, my heart goes out to...
Post-Traumatic Growth
Writing about the hero’s journey inspired me to continue with this positive theme and talk about Post-Traumatic Growth (PTG). “Trauma creates a rupture in a person’s life story. Assumptions about ourselves, our place in world, and our expectations about...
Feelings of Loss and Grief After the Psychopath is Gone
“Only people who are capable of loving strongly can also suffer great sorrow.” ~ Leo Tolstoy This morning a reader named Joanna said “I hate myself for missing him. Now I’m grieving badly and I so want to get rid of this heartache and heal.” No...
Faith That You Will Heal is the Key to Healing
In your darkest hours, you may wonder if you will ever heal from something as awful as what you have been through, having been the victim of a psychopath. The experience might have left you questioning the meaning and purpose of your life, and of life in general. It...
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