About the Author
Letting the Light Shine
I started this website in 2013, and since then these pages have been viewed over three million times. Each day, an average of 3,500 people make a stop here, many in the midst of a difficult journey. I dedicate this site to each one of you.
My purpose for this website is not to root out psychopaths and send a torch-bearing mob after them, nor do I attempt to cultivate feelings of fear or hatred; no one needs any help with that. The purpose of site is to help people who’ve been harmed in a relationship with a psychopath (by sharing what helped me), and to help them avoid getting involved in another one. Why? Because the differences between psychopaths and non-psychopaths are significant enough to cause severe emotional and psychological trauma. My goal is to leave readers feeling empowered.
When I started this site, I simply felt compelled to write. I had no idea if anyone would ever find their way here. I kept writing anyway, just to record my insights and the ideas and information I found helpful and enlightening, with the hope that it might one day help someone else. I learned and healed as I wrote.
It’s turned into much more than I ever thought it would. It’s become a place to find not just information, but also validation, understanding and support. This is so important and yet so often lacking for those of us who find ourselves victimized in this way. That shouldn’t be, because it happens more often and to more people than anyone would guess. Most people, myself included, didn’t even know anything like this was possible. It was nowhere on our radar.
I’m a woman who experienced firsthand what I write about — victimization by a high-functioning, sub-criminal psychopath who involved me in a relationship that caused a great deal of harm. Many people who visit this website are deeply traumatized, as I was during the first several months I wrote it. I want to make it clear that I’m not a mental health professional, and nothing contained in this website is meant to take the place of professional help. You’re probably dealing with a plethora of emotions including anger, deep sadness, loss and grief, confusion and betrayal, and it can feel unbearable. If you are, please find a qualified therapist, ideally one who understands the trauma caused by emotionally/psychologically abusive relationships, and who has knowledge of disorders characterized by a manipulative nature and lack of empathy (i.e. psychopathy and narcissism).
If you are in danger, or if you feel like harming yourself or someone else, please get help. You can start here:
- US: A LIST OF CRISIS HOTLINE NUMBERS (SUICIDE, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE, ETC.)
- International Directory of Domestic Violence Agencies
- International Suicide Hotlines
If you’re going through this experience please know that you’re not alone, and know there is life and love after this.
Some have asked me why I choose to remain anonymous. Although I would be proud to claim this website publicly, I choose anonymity to protect myself from cyberstalkers. Anonymity in no way changes my words or my intention, which is to provide validation, information, support and empowerment to those in need.
Best wishes to you on your healing journey,
Q: What’s with the images of cathedrals and windows?
A: The theme is about letting light shine on the dark places.
Contributors to this Website:
- Linda, reader and Resident Poet
- The readers who leave comments and bring this site to life by sharing their hearts and souls
- All the readers out there, without whom there would be no reason to write at all.
If this website has helped you,
would you please consider helping me to keep it up and running? You can do this by purchasing one or more books, which would help defray the costs associated with web hosting, security and design. Your support is deeply appreciated. Thank you.
“Excellent, excellent book! It brought me understanding and closure!”
“Invaluable. Having been in a relationship with a psychopath for many years, I desperately needed some insight into what had happened and why. I have gained a tremendous amount of strength and knowledge toward healing from years of abuse by reading this book. One of the best.”
“Five Stars. Very helpful.”
“Insightful and informative!”
“Wonderful read. Such a great gem…
…If you’re wondering if you are encountering a psychopath, read this book and you will know without a doubt.”
“Quite relevant and helpful, written in a useful down-to-earth-style which emphasizes the practical. Obviously written from direct experience.”
“The truth shall make you free… the description of typical behavior and common reaction to that behavior was more helpful to me in freeing myself than all the books on what a psychopath, sociopath or narcissist is”
“I feel like I just had an epiphany.”
“This book told me in a very concise format what I haven’t learned from two years of very expensive psychoanalysis AND a Master’s degree in Counseling: I’m not crazy! My intuition was not wrong.”
“This book provides instant clarity.”